QUEEN
I was having a more existential kind of day when I wrote this. Why are we all here, What does it all mean?!?
It’s hard with everything these days.
Living and loving, working hard to get to the point, the end game
Looking up to see the many directions leading me back
Back to the starting place and the judging faces of shame.
I worry that I won’t make it to where I have always wanted to go
Will this be it, is this life, and am I even comfortable with this?
I can’t say I’m not lucky and maybe I’m just selfish, but
Right now, today, it’s only the beginning of what I wish.
My future isn’t clear and someone like me, it’s hard not to see
I want to control it all, risky choices while being so cautious
Used to be called weird but today they call it an anomaly,
I call it fearful and headstrong after all the times I lost it.
Each day, memories of who I was, is shocked at who I became
But I’m still growing with age as a number and within
So who will I be in the next decade? What will life be then?
I’m sure I will keep making mistakes, catholic sin.
Will I make it, will I get to the end game?
Can’t say no, can’t say yes, but I need to say something
Because inside I’m scared of dying having never made it
Not to the moon, not to the stars, I just want it all to mean something.
Waking up each day, I try to make it worth it, trying to accomplish.
Walking one step forward but two steps back, never giving in
Because then the legacy won’t be made and I will be no one
My life can’t be in vain, I want it to inspire others to begin.
Fear should be my middle name, usually too afraid to speak
But speaking anyway so that it will push me farther,
Reminding the world that I exist and that my dreams matter
Because one day, I plan to be someone much larger.
Not the president or a prime minister leading a country
History has plenty of room for a paragraph about me
When I did something big to move us all along
When I helped to make a difference they all see
If I can get somewhere, I can make changes for the better
Not a perfect world but remembered for the right things
It’s not about the money and the fame as many might think
But it’s virtue that I wish for if I was King or better yet, Queen.
Will I make it, will I get to the end game?
Can’t say no, can’t say yes, but I need to say something
Because inside I’m scared of dying having never made it
Not to the moon, not to the stars, I just want it all to mean something.
I just want to be remembered, not forgotten and turned into dust
It’s such a short life and time has already passed so rapidly
Can’t stop the time from ticking or the days from ending
But when it’s time to go, who doesn’t want to leave happily?
